Polyamorous relationships are not for the timid. I think that should be understood right from the beginning. Secondly, one needs to have a good understanding of what they all entail before getting themselves immersed in one. The reason I’m writing about this is; my girl is presently dealing with issues involved with the couple that she’s been seeing for the last month or so. Honestly, I wasn’t completely on board with her desire to enter into a poly relationship with the couple, but she felt she needed outside companionship since we’re unable to get together for long stretches of time. The couple claimed to have a fairly good understanding of what poly is, how it affects the core relationship, and that they were well suited for bringing in another into said relationship.
Well, apparently they oversold that last one. Without going into too much detail, soon after my girl was ‘officially’ incorporated into the couple’s dynamic, problems began to crop up. (Or perhaps the problems were already there, but they now had the opening to come out) Jealousy flared from one side, even though apparently the other partner was either unaware of it, or was too timid to get involved. Which to me sounds a bit childish, more than a little bit irresponsible, and finally downright mean. In the last day or so it got to the point where the aggrieved partner faked a heart episode and demanded to be taken to the ER. Once there, it fell upon my girl to ‘be the adult’ and be responsible, even though she was clearly being played.
In the meantime, I’m up north here, hearing about it, watching it play out and feeling my stomach be pulled into knots knowing I don’t really have much say in how all of this plays out. Naturally, when there’s a problem, I get a text message, a call, or some other form of communication from my girl letting me know about it. At this point, if I had the funds, I’d drive down there and start knocking heads together. If for no other reason, than just to feel like I’m able to DO something.
As it stands right now, my girl is pretty fed up with these people and is distancing herself from them. How much distance remains to be seen, but as usual I’m attempting to be as supportive as I can from a distance.
Even now, I’m a bit hesitant in posting about this. But this is my forum, this is what’s going on in my life, it’s MY damn journey, so I’m writing about it. There. I feel better. Now off to rake some leaves, to get some of this pent-up energy expended.