Tag: rules

New friends and application of the rules

Reading Time: 3 minutes

On my slave’s Fetlife account, she has a profile.  In that profile, it details a good deal about her as well as touches on different portions of her ‘Fet Life’ so far.  One of the things I require her to have in it is what someone needs to do if they wish to ‘friend her’ on the site.  Specifically, they need to read her profile in its entirety and follow the directions embedded within.  If they can’t manage to do that, then they don’t deserve to be on her friends’ list.  That seems very fair if you ask me.  If you can’t do the work, you don’t get rewarded.   Her ex couldn’t manage to do this, so he didn’t get friended.

As in most social networks, or even personals sites, women’s in boxes get flooded.  Unless a male is offering something really special, their inbox hardly ever gets mail.  It’s been that way ever since I started before there was an established Internet and more than likely it will remain that way for as long as I’ll be online.   Just one of ‘those things’ you accept as being the norm and deal with it.  The reason I’m mentioning that is, my slave gets probably a good amount of mail from prospective people who read her profile to a certain extent, see her pictures or in other ways have interacted with her and wish to be part of her ‘inner circle’.  Others are hangers-on, or just want to add her to their friends’ list and never contact her again.  Like me, she’s not a friend collector, so her list of people she interacts with is small.  Myself, I’ve been on Fetlife for the better part of 10 years now and my own friends’ list numbers no more than 60 at any given time.

Every now and again she asks me if someone can be added to the list.  I decide on a case-by-case basis.  It’s an odds on bet that the person in question hasn’t necessarily followed the rules, and they’re asking for an exception to be made.  Or it’s someone she met at a munch or some other sort of get-together that she’s been to.  So I’ll scoot over to their profile, have a look-see, and if everything seems to check out, and I don’t feel there’s something untoward in their profile, I agree she can add them.  Of course, if after being allowed into the ‘inner sanctum’ they start to misbehave, or begin to make overtures about her interactions with them, I’ll inevitably hear about it.  My girl knows on which side her ‘bread is buttered’, she’s not going to just go off with someone because they have a good line or two to lay on her.  She’s content in being owned by me, she’s not interested in being owned by anyone else.  And that’s the way it’s going to always be.

Social networks are a great way for we as people to interact, to be in contact and to make new friends.  Even so, as tools, they need to be used with great care and respect.

Stay on topic!

Reading Time: 4 minutes

I don’t as a rule spend a great deal of time on Facebook, but the times that I go there, I check on a few things, then leave again for the better part of day or more.  I’m a member of quite a few diverse groups, and yes, some of them are kink related.  Though I do my best to relegate the ‘kink’ portion of my life from the interests of vanilla people who I’m related to, friends with on Facebook, simply because it’s a conversation I really don’t think I need to be having with them.

One of the groups that I have been a member of for many months is ‘Friends who like Steel Restraints’.  It’s mostly a picture sharing group, with an occasional post from someone detailing their interest with the topic.  So far as I can tell, there’s one Admin, she’s submissive, but is fairly active.  In the last week there’s been a couple of members that have been posting pictures that are most definitely off-topic.  Yes, they have references to BDSM in them, however none of them have steel restraints, which is the topic of the group.  The member that keeps reoffending is from the Middle East, so I can pretty much guarantee that English is not his primary language.  Seeing as I’ve been berating him for his pictures for the last week, he’s been on occasion messaging me asking what my problem is, and why I’m so irate over his pictures.  I keep explaining over and over that his pictures are inappropriate for the group.  But he just doesn’t get it.  Too, up until yesterday, I was pretty much the only one in the group (of over 4,000 people) who has said anything negative.  Usually there are comments like “Nice” and “Wish it was me”  and so on.  I suppose many people are just too polite to mention that he’s not following the rules of the group.

Late last night, someone in the group had ‘liked’ my comments and observations, and then the offending pictures disappeared by this morning.  I had found one of the original posts by the Admin and asked if she was interested in sharing duties as Admin, if she was feeling overwhelmed.  I never got a reply from her, so I guess she feels that she’s got a good handle on the situation.  Which is fine, it’s her baby, let her deal with the brouhaha.  Also this morning, someone posted a series of pictures that were dead on with the topic of the group, so not only did I thumbs up it, I also commented thanking her for posting it.  She replied while I was at work, and I answered.  She hasn’t replied to that reply, but that’s ok.  I posited some theories about Gor, as her username started with ‘Kajira’, and I have some knowledge of the Normanian universe.  Read the books at an earlier time in my journey.

Chained-together20180627_233225.jpgThe few pictures that I’ve posted to the group have been well received, and even now a couple of months later, people are still commenting and liking them.  So I know I, at least am on the right side of the angels.  I really didn’t want to leave the group, as the topic is something I’m very interested in.  Just want it to be good for everyone there, without being tainted by either bad apples, or clueless figs.